Yesterday was K's big competition. She skated very well, and was confident and proud when she came off the ice. Then the results were posted, and she discovered that she was in last place. At first, she seemed to take it well, but when we went to the locker room to change and we were alone, she melted down. She was devastated. She sobbed for a long time.
We had talked about this possibility before we even signed up. We thought we were prepared. But nothing could prepare me for the look on my baby's face when she let her emotions go. I really doubted my sanity for letting her do this. How could I let her get so hurt?
A day has passed now, we've talked to some moms and skaters who have been where we are, and we are all calmer. We remember now that our only goal with this competition was to get there and skate. K definitely met that goal. She was beautiful and calm, and she skated as well as she could, which was pretty fantastic. I've posted the video here. Isn't she beautiful?
Thanks to an acquaintance on an elist, I've also remembered why I've let her pursue ice skating at all. It's one of the only things she does that is truly challenging. She's not a natural - she has to work hard at this, which she happily does. Age is not a factor - her achievement is almost entirely dependent on just how hard she works. That is so valuable for a kid like K, for whom so many things come easy.
To remind K of how far she has come in the past two years, I made a video of clips of her skating from the very first week until now. We are so proud of her. I hope that she can remember to be proud of herself, too.
This afternoon, K was mostly ready to move on. She wants to skate this program again in a couple weeks at a smaller, less intense competition. She also wants to skate more often to improve more quickly. She is looking forward to taking a skating test and joining a Theatre on Ice team early next year. She has much to look forward to.
So it was a rough 24 hours, but K survived. Was it worth it? I don't know yet.
Friday, November 2, 2007
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6 comments:
I love seeing the videos! Thanks for posting them. :)
Fwiw, I think you did the right thing by following K's lead and letting her compete. She'll be a stronger person for it, and if she's going to be a serious competitive skater, then she'll have to contend with disappointing herself at times. It's also a successful experience in that she's responding by challenging herself to work harder, rather than give up entirely. That response shows how great a job you're doing raising her, and how strong a person she's becoming. :) So grats to you both!!!
Congratulations to K she did a great job! I see a huge improvement in her skating. I am sorry she was crushed. That it so hard for her. I hope she recovers soon and comes back even stronger.
Whew, that is hard. But congratulations to you both for taking a risk. And especially congratulations to K for getting out there and doing it. I think she is great!!
When Rose danced her first competition (aged just 5) we didn't even stay to see the results, we just wanted her to have the experience. I hope K can get past her disappointment to appreciate the wonderful experience of skating in a public competition. And you of course know she will be a stronger, wiser person for this. If nothing else, it is a good wake-up call to the hard realities of competitive skating, and will show her whether she is willing to continue or not, faced with such disappointment alongside exhilaration.
Oh but it hurts, doesn't it?
Thank you all for your kind words. I appreciate the support! It has definitely been a tough time for parenting, but thank you for reassuring me that this will have a learning element eventually!
Patience, I so wish we had left before the results. We told her from the beginning that results didn't matter. We could have shown that with our actions! It didn't even occur to me that we had the option - I am such a rule-follower. Oh hindsight is always 20/20.
I love both the videos. I think she was really really great!
I am sorry that K was so hurt. I can understand that. But I also think it is okay for our kids to sometimes be in those situations. I hope it will make her stronger.
hugs and thanks again for the videos, you did a great job editing that second one.
Wow, I watched the video, she was amazing!! She seems to really "feel" what she is doing.
I am sorry she is crushed, but I hope it just makes her stronger:)
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